Spider-Man has no "control" power, at least in the sense of some psi talent that he can use to influence the behavior of others. What hishe does have is tremendous control of his super-ability. While fighting Manslaughter Spidey remarked that he always pulls his punches when fighting villains. Unlike any other random brawling human being, no matter how enraged he gets, Spidey never swings or kicks with full force. If he did, he would instantly kill nearly every villain he faces. Consider that an ostrich can kill a man with a kick and Spider-Man can kick at least two orders of magnitude harder than any ostrich.
Imagine what would happen if a person who can do this...
... got angry and punched you in the face with all his might. Or punches you with even a tenth the force he was capable of producing.