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Spoilers for S07E06:

When Jon and Daenerys have their chat after their return to Dragonstone, Jon calls her "Dany". Daenerys says that no-one has called her this for a long time. Why does Jon use the shortened, nickname form of her name, how does he know that it will be well-received (and he won't be devoured by a dragon or burned to a crisp for insolence), and how does he even know about the shortened form if no-one has used it for a long time?

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    If you're trying to form a closer bond with someone, which appears to be romantic, would you use their full name which in this case is too long to quote, or would you use a short personal name?
    – TheLethalCarrot ♦
    Aug 22, 2017 at 9:53
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    I wondered where he got "Dany" from. Surely no one was using that name for him to hear and pick up. Is Dany a well known nickname of Daenerys?
    – camden_kid
    Aug 22, 2017 at 13:07
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    Perhaps an unsatisfying answer: because the writers are trying to force something they know the fans would love. It's quite convenient that Jon (as opposed to some other character Daenerys is close with, like Jorah or Daario) calls her Dany. It's even more convenient how it just so happens to be Dany (as opposed to say Day, or D). Furthermore, using cute nicknames to refer to friends/lovers is not characteristic of Jon: he never had called Ygritte, "Yig", or anything like that. And his relationship with Daenerys is political. Surely a certain level of professionalism should be expected.
    – MathematicsStudent1122
    Aug 22, 2017 at 15:41

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He's trying to form a closer bond with her

As per Tyrion's own words (not exact as it is from memory):

I suppose the longing looks your way are in hope of forming a strong military ally.

It also appears that Dany has an attraction towards Jon as she waits for him on the wall, looks worried at the state he's in and sits by his bedside with him among other things.

With all this they both seem to have a romantic attraction towards each other. In this case to further the bond would you try to call her, her full name:

Queen of the Andals, the Rhoynar and the First Men (claimant), Protector of the Realm (claimant), Queen of Meereen, Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea, Mother of Dragons, The Unburnt, Breaker of Chains

Or the name close friends do:

Daenerys

Or would you try and make your bond seem closer by using a more personal touch:

Dany

I'll leave that as an open ended question but I know which one I'd go for.

OOU it's a set up for the next line as well:

How about My Queen.

Regarding the edited question:

If I told you my name was Joseph, what nickname would you pick? Joe, Seph, Jose? I think you'd go for Joe. The same applies here, he just shortens her name to Dany.

He also doesn't know someone else used to call her Dany; it's a nickname he has chosen for her though I presume he'll choose another one as per her reaction.

Lastly, he doesn't know that she won't burn him, but he's counting on her not being bat-shit crazy and her liking the name. To form a closer bond with someone, risks have to be taken, and I'm pretty confident that him calling her Dany is one of the lesser risks in such a situation.

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    But why does Jon know that Daenerys will react well to that name (and not burn him to a crisp for insolence), or even that it is her nickname?
    – Gremlin
    Aug 22, 2017 at 10:33
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    @Gremlin If I told you my name was Joseph what nickname would you pick? Joe, Seph, Jose? I think you'd go for Joe. The same applies here. He doesn't know it's a nickname someone else once called her, it's a nickname he's calling her.
    – TheLethalCarrot ♦
    Aug 22, 2017 at 10:35
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    So it's a coincidence (in-universe) that the name he comes up with is the same that others called her? I guess it could be the most likely explanation, even if it's a bit unsatisfying.
    – Gremlin
    Aug 22, 2017 at 10:38
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    @Gremlin How is it unsatisfying? All names have common short forms: Joe -> Joseph, William -> Will/Bill, Peter -> Pete, Daniel -> Dan, Daenerys - > Dany, etc...
    – TheLethalCarrot ♦
    Aug 22, 2017 at 10:40
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    Idk Nery seems like a pretty good nickname to me as well. Guess Jon just got lucky that the nick he chose was the one used by her family
    – Aegon
    Aug 22, 2017 at 10:44

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