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I'm trying to find a fantasy/sci-fi book in which the main (human) character is kidnapped by intelligent dinosaurs. The dinosaurs are human sized and their behavior varies strongly based on sex. The females are dominant and generally aggressive, while the males are docile, more artistic and sensitive and used mainly for breeding. Males are kept separate from females.
The lizard/dinosaur type creatures have their own language which uses their tales to communicate. The human main character learns their language to survive, while the female captured with him fails to do so and is killed by the Dinosaurs.
One of the female Dinosaurs decides to keep the main character as a slave, she also rapes him at least once.
When he escapes and rejoins a human village, the main character ends up living with a woman with a harelip.
Later in the story another group of creatures show up who are very sexual and cannot handle their alcohol. The creatures they end up with have beautiful tails they use to hide their genitalia.