12

I believe I read this in a fantasy humor anthology, in English, probably 10-15 years ago although that's a total spitball of an attempt to date it. I don't remember any stories being in the same anthology. It's set in a generic medieval fantasy village with a member of the village (I keep wanting to say that his name was "Bob" or something similarly mundane and slightly anachronistic) who reveres elves and talks about wanting to join them, much to the annoyance of his fellow villagers. He decides to make his dream a reality and travels to an elf hill, where he petitions to join the elves (I want to say that he specifically keeps saying he wants to be "one with the elves"). His persistence pays off and the elves come out to tell him that his wish was granted, leading to the twist ending in the last sentence with something like the following:

And so they ate him.

It might be contemporary with the first Chicks in Chainmail collection, but the plot doesn't match that particular collection.

9

Dances with Elves by Cynthia Ward. I read it in The Mammoth Book of Comic Fantasy 2.

Eagle Striking asked, "Are you ready to be one with the Elves?"

Rooso smiled dreamily. "I am," he replied.

And so the Elves cooked and ate him.

  • Thank you. That indeed sounds correct. – FuzzyBoots Aug 27 '18 at 9:35

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