I'm looking for a sci-fi trilogy with a female lead, which I read years ago. I vaguely remember that her comms were set into her teeth or the back of her mouth, her ship - or the ship that was found and she was sent to check out - ended up being alive essentially (made up of microorganisms I believe, which could become anything they wanted to be) and it was a whole control thing. There were other races; I believe the MC was human. One race I remember specifically were very sexual beings with special pheromones and the book starts with the MC waking up after a night with one of that race (can't remember what they're called). I think the second book in the trilogy was based on war games and tactical practices that go horribly wrong due to the organisms that were the ship.
If the sexual race were called "di'Taykan" then you're looking for Tanya Huff's Valor novels, but the alien ship composed of microscopic life forms, Big Yellow, doesn't show up until the 4th novel Valor's Trial. (Training scenarios getting messed up happens in the previous book The Heart of Valor.)
The main character is Sergeant Torin Kerr - over the course of the series she works her way up from plain Sergeant to Gunnery Sergeant - and she does sleep with various di'Taykan over the course of the series. The soldiers have comm implants in their jaws, IIRC.
It is in this book that she (and some of the enemy) discover the truth about the war they have been fighting.