In the The Lego Movie rule 1 of the sea is "Never sit on a pirates face".
For reference, this is covered when they are breaking into the Octon tower, and Metalbeard disguises himself as a photocopier. Just after this one of the robots photocopies its butt, which enrages the metal-pirate.
Just after the above, Metalbeard states the rule, and the scene cuts back to his ship, where there were a bunch of other rules of the sea.
Is there a complete list of "Metalbeard's Rules of the Sea"?