I was pretty much in the same boat as you. Except I couldn't stand the show like just one or two episodes in lol.
But I started watching the Flash and when it came to the crossover bits, my OCD wouldn't let me continue without getting the full backstory from Arrow first, and so I had to stop watching that too :(
But then, just a few days ago, I found this fantastic episode of Arrow, called "Arrow: Year One". It's a Season 2 special, that recaps everything that happened in the first season, in just 40 frickin' minutes. Frickin' godsend, if you ask me. Made the whole thing sooo much more bearable.
I watched that, and got past all the sucky, tryhard, "show's finding its bearings" moments, getting only the most important bits, and then dove straight into Season 2.
Which is actually not so bad so far -- I'm on Episode 5. It seems more well grounded, and the actors seem to have settled into their roles nicely enough. Although, I still think Stephen Amell's "brooding" face is just as ehhhh as ever. Oh, and also that . . . uhm, I'll just call her "woman in black leather outfit", to not reveal spoilers . . . too. Absolutely cringe-worthy acting.
Anyway, before I blather on any further, I suggest you do what I did, to not miss anything important from the DCTVU. Find Arrow: Year One, then watch Season 2, then watch Season 3 and The Flash in this order that I found online:
Arrow: Season 3 | The Flash: Season 1
The Flash 1×01: Pilot
Arrow 3×01: The Calm
The Flash 1×02: Fastest Man Alive
Arrow 3×02: Sara
The Flash 1×03: Things You Can’t Outrun
Arrow 3×03: Corto Maltese
The Flash 1×04: Going Rogue
Arrow 3×04: The Magician
Arrow 3×05: The Secret Origin of Felicity Smoak
The Flash 1×05: Plastique
Arrow 3×06: Guilty
The Flash 1×06: The Flash Is Born
Arrow 3×07: Draw Back Your Bow
The Flash 1×07: Power Outage
The Flash 1×08: Flash vs. Arrow
Arrow 3×08: The Brave and the Bold
The Flash 1×09: The Man in the Yellow Suit
Arrow 3×09: The Climb
The Flash 1×10: Revenge of the Rogues
Arrow 3×10: Left Behind
The Flash 1×11: The Sound and the Fury
Arrow 3×11: Midnight City
The Flash 1×12: Crazy for You
Arrow 3×12: Uprising
The Flash 1×13: The Nuclear Man
Arrow 3×13: Canaries
The Flash 1×14: Fallout
Arrow 3×14: The Return
Arrow 3×15: Nanda Parbat
The Flash 1×15: Out of Time
Arrow 3×16: The Offer
The Flash 1×16: Rogue Time
The Flash 1×17: Tricksters
Arrow 3×17: Suicidal Tendencies
Arrow 3×18: Public Enemy
The Flash 1×18: All Star Team Up
Arrow 3×19: Broken Arrow
The Flash 1×19: Who Is Harrison Wells?
Arrow 3×20: The Fallen
The Flash 1×20: The Trap
Arrow 3×21: Al Sah-him
The Flash 1×21: Grodd Lives
The Flash 1×22: Rogue Air
Arrow 3×22: This Is Your Sword
Arrow 3×23: My Name Is Oliver Queen
The Flash 1×23: Fast Enough
Have a nice day, and a fun time watching your shows.
Disclaimer: All the ideas expressed in the above post are simply my opinion. If you disagree with them, that's okay; just move on.