Does Lwaxana know that Picard is avoiding her?

Question

There are a lot of instances where Picard is clearly making up an excuse to get away from Lwaxana Troi. Here's one, from TNG: Menage a Troi:

LWAXANA: Oh, Jean-Luc! Jean-Luc! Come have a drink with me. Tell me what you've been up to.

PICARD: Perhaps later, Lwaxana. Mister Data and I were just about to show Reittan Grax the er, the er, the new door mechanisms on the aft turbolifts. If you'll excuse us?

Then there's another time when Picard invited Data to crash his dinner with Troi, and spent the whole evening getting Data to spout inane filler.

And she never seems to call him on it. Is she unaware of how people feel about her or does she just not care, preferring instead to force people to endure awkward social situations?

There was a single line in TNG: Haven where Lwaxana implies Picard was having erotic thoughts about her, but Deanna clarifies that she was only joking. So it's not like she thinks there's a chance between them.

Given Betazoids' penchant for brutal honesty between each other, does Lwaxana totally understand that Picard is trying to avoid her and is simply amused that Picard is going through the trouble of making up an excuse instead of just telling her to p*ss off like any other Betazoid would?

Answer 1

I don't think we will find an interesting clear explanation in canon. However, to speculate, we can make an analogy to human behavior which might explain the situation.

Humans have varying ability to implicitly understand the thoughts and feelings of those around them. This isn't a telepathic ability, but is instead a skill which uses a lot of cues to inform the opinion (body language, voice pitch, attitude, etc). Some humans who are normally very good at judging what others are thinking or feeling can have this ability compromised to various degrees when there is a significant emotional attachment to their subject. For example, some people tend to think others are never sexually attracted to them, even though they can see sexual attraction in fine detail between others when they are not the subject of that attraction. The reverse opinion, thinking others are romantically interested even when they are not, is also common.

The level to which this ability is compromised is directly correlated with the level of emotion someone has invested in the subject they are trying to read. Mrs. Troi is completely infatuated with Picard. I think it is reasonable to assume that although an objective telepath would clearly see Picard isn't interested, Mrs. Troi instead makes excuses to herself for why she thinks he is or could be.

This method of storytelling is very common in Star Trek, and throughout science fiction. Characters are often built with characteristics which are examples of the human condition taken to super-human extremes. Those characters are then used to explore the nature of that facet of the human condition. In this case, we are exploring human empathy, emotion, and the effects they have on the perception of reality.

Answer 2

Yes, she knows (she's an empath), but I suppose that similar to the way some women will doggedly chase a man they want thinking they can wear him down, she keeps on anyway. However, in the episode in which she goes through the Betazoid version of menopause, they do have sex.